December 2011
Why being a girl isn't working out for me:
Body: Oh, guess what time of the month it is!
Me: Please, god, no--
Ovaries: ALL SYSTEMS GOOOOOOOO!!!
Brain: I quit. i quit. kittens and cupcakes and no one loves me. oh my god salty snacks i am furious
Me: Please, guys, calm down--
Face: TIME TO RUIN EVERYTHING YOU HAVE EVER LIKED ABOUT ME. I'M GROWING MOUNTAINS, BITCHES.
Brain: And now I'm ugly! shbdksdnksbn
Torso: Time to practice labor. cramp this bitch up. GO GO GO GO GO GO
Me: STOP IT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!
Stomach: lol clothes cant fit you anymore. you are bloated. you are now a balloooooooon!
Me: I hate you all
Brain: I KNOW EVERYONE HATES ME I AM SO DEPRESSED. we need to procreate.
Face: Lol, i'm not done yet.
Uterus: what did i ever do to deserve this?
Brain: you just wait uterus. they're going to make you hold a baby for like 9 months straight.
Uterus: You mother fuckers.
Torso: CONTRACT!
Me: I quit being female, I am now a llama.
Brain: Me gusta.
2 tags
dont ever hesitate. reblog this.
Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696
Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433
LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255
Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386
Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743
Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438
Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673
Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272
Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000
Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253
I dont know why this is so funny
808-state-of-mind:
HAHAHAHAHAHA
What JKR thought whilst writing Harry Potter
Oh, James and Lily are a flawless couple? Hm...I'll kill them.
Oh, Harry is happy with Sirius as a father figure? Let's kill him.
Oh, Dumbledore has been Harry's mentor since he was 11? Haha, lol, let's kill him.
Oh, Remus is happy for the first time since James and Lily died? Kill him.
Oh, Tonks is happy and has a child at home? Okay, she's DEFINITELY dying.
Oh, Dobby is finally free and happy? He doesn't deserve it. Die, Dobby, die.
Oh, everyone loves Fred? I'll kill him and drink their tears.
Oh, Snape is possibly one of the greatest characters in the book? LOL! DEAD!
4 tags
2 tags
Watchw-a-s-t-e-d-hipster:
missabigaily:
stop scrolling and watch this <3
this is fucking powerful
you are beautiful !!!